Twins of Faith 2012 Malaysia

Assalamualaikum w.b.t ..

Jeles kemain nengok ahkak sorang tu dok update hari-hari kisah pengembaraan di bumi pak Obama, banyak benda nak share, tttaapppppiiii......malas dah sampai tahap ke-8. Susah sangat nak lawan.. (yes, kill me now!!)

Anyhoo...taking from one of the habits of effective people, first things first, ITS BACK!! what is back? The Twins of Faith is back. This year with even more programs, jammed pack and looking at the agenda, I wish I can attend all, but I don't think its possible.

Some last minute promotion of the program. More on their website here.

am going, in Sha Allah :)

Ya Hanana - Cinta Masjid (TV AlHijrah)

Assalamualaikum w.b.t,

I am currently gugu gaga over this, loving this mucho, could not get this out of my head :)

An Epic Journey part 9

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahiwabarakatuh..

Last part we stopped at verse number 9. We shall continue with verse no 10.

“ A speaker among them said, ‘Do not kill Yusuf but throw him down the bottom of the well; some travellers will pick him up – if you would do [something].’

Which one of the brothers of Yusuf is being referred to in?

It was not mentioned which of Yusuf’s brother that made the statement.

28 : The lesson from this portion of ayat is, we should not reveal our fellow Muslim’s brother’s or sister’s mistakes, it may cause them to be humiliated , just state in general “somebody..” without mentioning the name if the intend to give lesson to others.

29. This ayat illustrates an Islamic legislative principle : “the lesser of the two evil should be chosen if choosing becomes necessary.”

This ayat…	Is used as evidence by the scholars who hold the view that the brothers of Yusuf were not prophets.
	Indicates that Yusuf was a small boy when this incident took place.
Points of benefits derived from this ayat:	30. The presence of wise advisors can assist in reducing or removing evil. A large proportion of regrettable actions are performed as a result of anger. The Muslims should be above getting angry for his own sake or for the sake of anyone other than Allah because it leads to regrettable consequences either in this world or in the Hereafter, or in both. Ibn Muflih al-Hanbali in his book, al-Adab al-Shar’iyyah (1/183) said : “ Ali bin Abi Talib (RA) said : ‘It may be known whether a person is really patient at the time of anger. The beginning of anger is madness and the end of it is regret, and anger cannot be justified by offering a humble apology. Calamities may come because of anger.’” The importance of sealing the sins of our Muslim brothers and sisters. The Prophet said: “Whosoever conceals the faults of a Muslim, Allah will conceal his faults in this world and the Hereafter.” [Sahih Muslim] Matters should be judged according to the content of a situation or action, not according to the person from whom a statement or action originates. Sins can be classified according to the nature of the evil inherent in the sin

It was said to al-Shu’bi  “Why is a person who quick to get angry also quick to calm down, and the one who is slow to to get angry , slow to calm down? ”. He replied: “Because anger is like fire; that which is easier to start is easier to extinguish.”

Wallahu'alam...

Of Being Better

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh..

Yet again, another year has passed. At the dusk of the last day of every Hijri year, did we ever ponder on what have we done for the past one year, as a Muslim. Have we done enough to make sure that we live to the 'Muslim' status. Do we really applied all the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (praise be upon him). Honestly, I never really did. When I was younger, I do make a conscious resolution at some start of Hijri year, to make sure that I completed my 5 daily prayers (yes, back then to complete the compulsory one was really a battle). Alhamdulillah, now its not as bad, though I still catch myself doing it at the very last minute.
But hold on, offering salah is not the only things that makes me Muslim.

What about my other obligations on this earth as khalifah? When will I start doing more for people rather than focus on many other self eccentric stuffs? This platform for a start, how many of the things that I shared that has benefited the ummah? Its there, but not as much as I hoped. Today during usrah, our naqibah shared a list of personal target, very appropriately timed with the new year :) Here is what the list look like :

1. Tilawah al-Quran : 1 juz per day (we strive to meet this target during Ramadhan, why not on the normal days?)
2. Al-Mathurat : once a day
3. Solat sunat rawatib : before/after each prayer
4. Qiamullail : 3 times per week
5. Interaction with neighbour : once a week
6. Puasa sunat : 3 times a month
7. Riadhah : 3 times a week
8. Istighfar : everyday
9. Read book : 30 mins a day
10. Memorize the ayat from al-Quran (with its meaning) - 1 ayat per day

We were encouraged to push the limit, to meet the target, and share how much we achieved with our naqibah on weekly basis. Honestly, it is a stretch list for me, but I have to try. We have to start somewhere. I think my biggest challenge would be the interaction with neighbour. I pretty much keep things to myself. My neighbour, on the right side is an Indian family and on the left is a Chinese family. I had more communication with the Indian family. They have a few kids, and the small ones like to say hi each time I get back from work, but after that I don't know what to do next, how do I take it much further. Maybe I should start by offering some kuih instead? (I think I did,when I first moved in..hehehe...)

Hijrah signifies the journey for the better life, just as the Muslim back then when they traveled from Mekah to Madinah, in hope to spread Islam and get out of the oppressed life in Mekah. Reading the story of hijrah makes me realize, I have not tried my best for any change that I wanted to make before. I lack that determination, and I think one way to motivate me is by keep on reminding myself of what the Prophet and the sahabah went through just to spread the word of Allah, I need that inspiration :D

Just to start, here's the story of Hijrah. May Allah give me strength in achieving the listed target...aamiiinnnn...
Salam Maal Hijrah 1434H!!

An Unexpected Briefing #airnzhobbit

Just a short one today, I thought this is funny and creative. The link was actually passed on via related work email. :)

To Lead or to be Lead?

Since I am on this trying to get back on the wagon for writing mood, let me share something that I gain last week. For the past 2 weeks, the company has been arranging session for people's development. This company I work with are among the forefront that creates top leaders, just to name a few, we have Idris Jala and the previous SC chairman, Zarinah Anwar. Even from the recruitment stage, they have various module to identify the 'leaders'.

We have been drilled with many leadership skills since the moment we step into the job, how much are we able to embed it, thats another debate. They used to have this thing called 9 Planets, which covers how a leader should behave/act, what should be done to cultivate that leadership quality. I barely knew all the planets and now they have changed to this new leadership attributes. Just so that I can remember what it is, I am sharing it here.

There was one particular session last week, the management team were called in and share their views on these attributes. Most of them started by sharing who inspires them i.e the role model. Which bags me to recall who was my role model. When I come to think of it, I normally don't emulate any good behaviours, I've seen many good leaders, in and out of the company, maybe some in school, but I have never made a conscious decision to start doing whatever that they are doing, or at least try to. Most of my actions or how I carry myself was on the basis "Don't do what this person is doing...". Which means I am avoiding what my bad role models are doing.

By taking that approach, does it do any good to my personal development? Maybe, but not so much in the direction that I potentially can achieve. I should start to do what is good, avoiding the bad, yes, but if I put to much constraints I'm afraid that I will end up doing nothing.

Main key take away from the session :

1. Value the things that we do. Having a proper process is good, but does all of it creates value? (Bak kata manager tu, jangan buat kerja syok sendiri :P)
2. Good managers/leaders are the one that able to stretch his people, able to identify how much the team can do, instead of going to the same willing person to get a job done.
3. Have a good relationship with people around you, as most of the things will be delivered by them.
4. Internalize what we want to do consistently until it becomes a habit, just do it, once your system recognize it can be done, you will be able to do it.
5. Last but not least (most importantly)...do not become indispensible, make whatever information that you holds visible to people, but of course within the boundary of authority the information is allowed to, based on your position.

There you go, you can take this and run away with it (read: me) or you can let it sits in your notebook, waiting for another moment of enlightenment in the future, take your pick.

About writing and all...

Nowadays, I am not thaaattt busy, and its not that I have nothing to write either, I have tonnes of materials to share (Surah Yusuf, anyone??) but somehow I just lost it. The ability and the sheer determination to write (or to type?). I do feel at lost by not writing. As if a part of me slowly fading away. Is this what people call writers block?

Who am I to call myself a writer, yes I do write stuff, non important stuffs to others but matters to me. I write things so that I won't forget (oh how I wish to have memories like an elephant :) ) There are times when I came across something, it hits me, I have to blog about this, but the moment IE is on, I got distracted by many other stuffs. I am losing focus. I need to get back on track.

It was not like this before, perhaps age is a factor? Riiigghhhttt.....conviniently blaming the age, keep it up girl...! Indeed istiqamah is a very challenging trait, and one has to start somewhere.

p/s: the most narcissistic post ever, count the number of 'I' apperance :P 

Mount Kinabalu Expedition 2012 montage

Buat kak yong, layan rock kapak jap, lagu ni yang first ni buat naik semangat!!

Wordless Wednesday

Heaven....!!!

Me: I ternampak out of office mail from farrah, she's on maternity leave till feb 2013, thats 6 months!! gila kaya, company only bagi 2 months, lain tu kira unpaid,


S: lamanya

Me: paling abis pon 3 rd month setengah bulan gaji

S: dia amek sabbatical? is that even the right spelling

Me: entahla...adui..if only money is not a constraint kita pon boleh gak..i wanna go arab/spain 3 bulan, belajar bahasa dorang, balik sini fluent boleh bukak kelas bahasa

S:heheheheh and then buat full time , happier i think

Me:me think so too...bukak bakeri kat seblah tu, heaven!!!

pic curik dari pakcik google :D

An Epic Journey part 8

Assalamu'alaikum warahmatullahiwabarakatuh...

Slowly but surely, here is the next part, may we all take the lesson from this one ayat. :)

“Kill Yusuf or cast him out to [another] land; the countenance [i.e., attention] of your father will [then] be only for you, and you will be after that a righteous people."

It is apparent from this ayah,	…that the brothers are determined to seek forgiveness for this sin before committing the crime.
	The danger of falling prey to Shaytan’s whispers.
	25. We should take heed from this part of the story by knowing that the truth should be adhered to in all situations, even if it means going against majority.
	26. How sins gives rise to more sins.
	27. How anger and jealousy lead to sin. Both characteristics are a result of the evil whispers of Shaytan, which only lead to evil, sins and tragedy.

Evils of Jealousy
Definition	Jealousy or envy is defined as resenting the blessing of Allah that has been granted to the one being envied. The envier wishes that the blessing were taken away from the other person regardless of whether he wants that blessings or not.
Existence of jealousy: proof from the Al-Qur’an	Many of the People of the Scripture wish they could turn you back to disbelief after you have believed, out of envy from themselves [even] after the truth has become clear to them. So pardon and overlook until Allah delivers His command. Indeed, Allah is over all things competent. – Al-Baqarah : 109 And from the evil of an envier when he envies." – Al-Falaq: 5 Hasad: when Allah gives somebody something and you wish you can have that by taking it away from that person.
Existence of jealousy: proof from the Sunnah	“ The Prophet said: The disease of a nation who came before you has started to spread among you: jealousy and hatred. This is the shaver (destroyer); I do not say that it shaves hair, but it shaves (destroys) faith. By the One Whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of that which will strengthen the love between you? Spread (the greetings of) salam among yourselves. ” At-Tirmidhi
Scholars explain that the jealousy can be caused by:	Enmity: one has ill feeling for a person and does not want to see anything good happen to that person. Ambition: it hurts one to see someone else progresses ahead or above oneself. Pride and arrogance: when a person is self-conceited and arrogant, he feels jealous to witness anyone else progressing or doing better. Astonishment: sometimes one feels astonished and surprised that another can do better than oneself. Fear: that if another obtains something, then he himself might not have it. Desire for power and prestige: sometimes one becomes jealous because one wants to make himself seem better by putting others down. Evil nature and avarice of the heart: some people just do not like to see others happy. They want to see the whole world in misery and difficulty except themselves.
Remedies for jealousy	We must remember that it is haram and that it displeases Allah SWT. An effective remedy to overcome jealousy is to strive to do good to the person we feel jealous to, especially in the matter that we feel jealous off. For example, if the jealousy tells us to harm a person or do bad things, try to do good, show more kindness or make that person happy. This is not an easy task, but a necessary one. You will please Allah, avoid a sin and render your heart content and at peace.

If you see something good in or with another person and you also want the same thing for yourself, without hating the other person or wishing for that person to lose that good thing, then this is not called jealousy in Islam, its called Ghibtah.

It is narrated that the Prophet said: “Do not envy one another, do not sever ties with one another, do not hate one another, and be, O slaves of Allah, brothers.”

Abdullah Ibnu Mas’ud narrates that the Prophet SAW said: “Nothing deserve to be jealous of except when a person is given two things, (1) wealth and spend it well to the road of Allah, and (2) Al-Qur’an and Sunnah, and he understands, practise and spreads the teaching of both.”

Wallahua'lam...

9 oo 10 (nine out of ten)

I have not been excited to attend wedding for quite some time, but getting the invite for last Sat's wedding gives glimmer in my eyes (over la tu kan...hahaha..) Back in my diploma days, in the class I used to have this clan. There were 10 of us, anywhere we go, be it to the class, to the cafe, we always hang out together. I did blog about us here. Last Saturday was the wedding for Azs. This time we missed Nisah and Ecah. 8 out of 10 :) good enough!!

dengan pengantin...hubbynya pemalu...duduk kat bilik..hahaha....

Captured by Sarah's hubby, obviously an amateur :P. Kema and Amy was our mate from the same faculty but different course.

We got there around 1pm, after all the group pics session, Joe had to leave and we stayed there chatting still. Things did not ends there, we moved over to Ekin's house that was just 10 mins drive away. We chatted like schoolgirls while the kids had fun bringing the house upside down :P

We each make a move back to where we belong around 6.30. We had fun catching up. Its not easy to get the majority to be there at the same time. Hopefully there will be a next time, insyaAllah...!! :D

Belated Card~ (raya tak habis lagi ke...?)

Assalamualaikum w.b.t,

Dah  seminggu lebih raya, baru perasan tak sempat post kad raya pon tahun ni :) This one was sent on my last day working, punya la rushing sampai lupa nak panjangkan ke sini, seperti biasa, izinkan saya menjual beberapa rangkap pantun..!!

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

Salam aidilfitri...!! Sorry dah raya ke-4 baru sempat wish.
Taqaballahuminna wa minkum.. Semoga Allah menerima amalan kamu dan amalan saya.
Latest experiment from the sisters. ;)

V-(I)-B-G-Y-O-R(P)

Save Maryam

Assalamualaikum w.b.t,

Dearest brothers and sisters, this was shared to us during the recent Al-Kauthar's course. The campaign is led by Mercy Mission UK. Its really happening, and if nothing is being done, what we fear will come true. Please help to spread the word. A strong reminder to all to keep our aqidah checked. Not just for ourselves, our family's and our dear friend's too. May Allah help us. Amiinnn......

Are you ready....?

Lagi-lagi hasil plagiarism :P

I still could not quit my day job yet...hehehehe... :D

An Epic Journey part 7

Assalamualaikum w.b.t...

Sesungguhnya istiqamah itu banyak cabaran, ternyata saya belum cukup kuat menepis gangguan yang banyak membantutkan niat untuk terus berkongsi di sini. After a very long delay, hopefully with the coming Ramadhan, I am able to discipline myself to continue sharing this, insyaAllah...

We stopped at ayah 5 in the last chapter. 

Ayah 6

"And thus will your Lord choose you and teach you the interpretation of narratives and complete His favor upon you and upon the family of Ya'qub, as He completed it upon your fathers before, Ibrahim and Ishaq. Indeed, your Lord is Knowing and Wise."

This ayah establishes the fact that nubuwwah (prophethood) is a status  and honour only Allah (SWT) grant. He alone bestows it as He wils. 19. This ayah refutes the philosophers and the extreme Sufis who argue that prophethood or  its anologues can be attained by having a strong desire and exerting oneself to achieve them. They assert that prophethood is “knowledge and action”, this ayah disapprove their view, establishing that prophethood is a blessing from Allah and that He bestows this blessing upon whomsoever He wishes. According to some scholars the words of Allah SWT above refer to the prophethood of Yusuf AS.
	There is difference of opinion among the scholars regarding the meaning of these words : Interpretation of narratives Knowledge of Allah’s book Knowledge of the way of the prophet
	Blessing of Yusuf AS becoming a prophet Blessing of Yusuf AS of interpreting a dream.
	This term means “your two fathers”. However, as the ayah continues it mentions Ibrahim and Ishaq as his “two fathers”, not Ishaq and Ya’qub. Why? In Arabic grammar, it’s fine to address the grandfather, great-grandfather and great-great grandfather as AB
	Allah is all knowing and all wise in His choice of making Yusuf  a prophet.

20. Significantly this ayah teaches us the value and essential nature of having a strong sense of identity.

Ayah 7

Certainly were there in Yusuf and his brothers signs for those who ask,

21. Verily in Yusuf and his brethren there are ayat (proof, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, indications, clues, hints) for those who ask. (in other ayah, we are only asked to ponder, not ask). Showing that Surah Yusuf is a complete and clear revelation, and its only left to be queried by us to understand.

Ibn al-Qayyim:

In his book Al-Jawwab al-Kahfi he writes that they are more than a thousand benefits in Surat of Yusuf.

Ayat 8

When they said, "Yusuf and his brother are more beloved to our father than we, while we are a clan. Indeed, our father is in clear error."

	It is reported that the brother of Yusuf referred to in this ayah was Binyamin
	Refer to a group that has  3-10 people in the group (by Quraisy’s definition) A group that has 10-15 people Group of 10-40
	Dhala – misguided , not in terms of religion but how he distribute his love among his children
It can observed from this ayah: That loving the young and the weak is part of an individual’s nature disposition. The brothers of Yusuf exaggerated in their explanation of the situation. As the story proceeds, we will observe this phenomenon several more times. This teaches us the deceptive nature of exaggeration. Exaggeration and embellishment of the truth are some of the evils in communication, and are classified as lying. “The Prophet said: I urge you to be truthful, for the truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to Paradise. A man will continue to be truthful and seek to speak the truth until he is recorded with Allah as the speaker of the truth (siddiq). And beware of lying , for lying leads to immorality, and immorality leads to Hell; a man will continue to tell lies until he is recorded with Allah as a liar.” [al-Sahihayn]
Why the exaggeration	Communication experts have documented some of the main reasons why people feel the need to exaggerate: They want to sound more interesting; They want more sympathy from the listener; They want to embellish their point and make it more convincing They want to use the power of numbers to get the point across, even if it means lying about the numbers.
Forms of exaggeration	Obvious exaggeration When it is just meant to express the situation, not meaning to lie, if the norm teaches us the speaker is being expressive.
	Absolute exaggeration All, everybody, everyone (generalising the masses) may lead things like “everybody is upset” to be a form of lying (whereas in fact not everybody is upset). Be precise on the statement, try to avoid those words.
	Indirect exaggeration Try to sway the other person’s thinking
Being just and fair between one’s children	The brother felt that Yusuf AS was more loved and more favoured by their father. Fueled by these emotions, they went so far as to plot to kill him. This highlights the importance of the principle of Islam teaches of treating our offspring justly and fairly. Al- Nu’man b. Bashir once addressed the people from the pulpit and told them about what took place between the Prophet and his father, saying: “My father gave me a gift. Then my mother, Amrah binti Rawhah, said: I will not be satisfied until Allah’s Messenger is a witness to it.’ So my father went to the Allah’s Messenger and said: ‘I gave a gift to my son from Amrah binti Rawhah, and she told me to have you be a witness to it, O Messenger of Allah.’ The Prophet asked: ‘Did you give your other children something similar?’ He replied that he had not. So the Prophet said: ‘Fear Allah, and be just between your children.’ [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Is it blameworthy to love one child more than the other?

No. its normal for human to have different feelings to different children, and children are no exception, the important thing is to treat them justly.

Scholars have also extracted the following three points of benefits from this ayah:

22. We learn from this verse the stipulation of authenticating before acting, acting on unconfirmed knowledge must be avoided at all times:

‘O ye who believe! If a rebellious person comes to you with a news, verify it, lest you harm people in ignorance, and afterwards you become regretful to what you have done’

23. A group of people can agree on misguidance.

24. Blind loyalty and allegiance on an individual can have negative consequences – tie haq and batil to Al-Quran, not to the people.

Till we meet in the next installment, pray to Allah that I can continue to complete this :)

Wordless Wednesday - Wishlist!!

keren bangat!!!!

Nak mintak belated birthday gift...sapa sudi bagi...hehehe....Kak Tek.....!!!! :D
Resepi kat sini.

Parcel from the Haram (jangan salah faham ;) )

I wanted to post this last night, but I don't know where I misplaced my bband, so doing it now :)

Yesterday I received a parcel, with some arabic writings on it. The first thing I saw was a postcard, and instantly I knew who was it from. :D

the postcard was for the original sender ;)

But hold on..normally its not this much, then I started to open up the package, its a bunch of posters (maybe newsletters) and another postcard meant to the original sender. I quickly texted her, and after series of text later, I finally understand, there must be some glitch at either Saudi's post office or Post Malaysia itself. The whole thing was put into a transparent plastic bag, and the only visible address was yours truly :P

The parcel was by mistake sent all to me.  

the original receipient!!

I wanted to open it, but since there is visible address on each package, I chose not to :) Today, I am mailing this back to the intended receipient.

And this one is for me :D syukran ya ukhti dieya!!

Rindunya nak solat depan Kaabah..lepak di Masjidil Haram....

Hallluuu........

Assalamu'alaikum.....ada orang kat rumah...? Lama betul tak jenguk ke sini...(aisheh...post bahasa melayu pulak..hehehe...)

Well, actually today is not really a happy day, I was partially heartbroken....why...? Portugal lost their semis, of course, the only saving grace is they lost to Spain, another favorite of mine and they fought all the way up till the penalty shoot out.

During Europe war period, I have been pretty occupied keeping myself up to date on the games and scores. Despite being in the group of death (again!!) Portugal really showed their true capabilities. C.Ronaldo did well as captain, but its not a one man show. I think critics would tend to agree that this Portugal team are among the best that they have seen with Pepe & Fábio Coentrão holding the fort tightly at the back. Solid defending, even the German attacking machine only managed to score once.

I've said this since 2004, they just need to have a better finishing. No doubt C.Ronaldo did managed to score, some good ones I might say, but they still lacking on forward. Nani has been slightly under the radar, but still very helpful with the passes. The best forward that they have maybe Helder Postiga, but still needs more polishing. Too bad my favorite no. 6 Carvalho was not playing, else it would have been more interesting, especially for last night's game against Spain, where most of their teammates from Galacticos were playing :P

Anyhoo....I was entertained in all the games, especially with fluid movements of João Moutinho & Raul Meireles, indeed a world class performance.

I leave you with my closing statement. I love Portugal since.....2000 (I think). Way before C.Ronaldo make headlines worldwide. I supported them since the days of Pauleta was their top scorer, since Luis Figo was not the most cap holder, since João Pinto was among their biggest star, and even since my first ever Portuguese crush was on top of his form, who else, Nuno Gomes. So kids, Christiano Ronaldo did not seal the deal...I was a fan way back when.. :)

the magnificent 11!!

June is here!! :)

Warning : this is not an educational post :P

Its my month!! Many happy things happen this month. In school, there used to be not less than 10 of us celebrating birthday this month. So a whole bunch of Geminis and Cancerians will be happy this month. For me, personally, many life events also happened this month. I celebrated my work anniversary this months :) I made my umrah trip, and my world cup trip also in the month of June. For the past two cycles, the company's major turn around was also scheduled in June, and I get a surprised birthday celebration in one of the occasion :D. Well, that was the story from 4 years ago.....sigh....I am old...in the company I mean!!

Do you know that June is known for the large number of marriages? Yes, it is, it occurs over the course of the month. According to one etymology, June is named after Juno (Hera). Juno was the goddess of marriage and a married couple's household, so some consider it good luck to be married in this month.^[1] -

This is from wikipedia of course, for Malaysians we couldn't care less about Greek mythology, its school holiday, and that is why your mailbox will be jammed with invites comes June...and this is why you keep seeing June babies increasing, year in and year out :P

For my friends out there celebrating birthdays in June, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! may Allah grant you his utmost blessing and a fruitful year ahead ;)

Honeysuckle - June birth flower

Rose, another June birthflower :)

p/s: Europe is going to war..!!! and I am watching the war from here...hahaha..no trip to watch the war live :P

Wordless Wednesday : Muchas gracias!!

Latest collection :)

With some bunch of your other stuffs as well

Babe, we may have just started a new tradition!! :D

Talkative Tuesday : 30 and solo ;)

Its been a while, and I have yet to finish on my Middle Earth trip. Thanks for all the prayers for my friend, she has been officially transferred to normal ward, despite being in the ICU for ~3 weeks ++. She has a long road to recovery though, but nonetheless, we are grateful, alhamdulillah.

Off late, this topic has been revolving around me. I attended a course over last weeked, A-Z of Love & Mercy. It talks abouth Fiqh of Nikah and Divorce, and before you get too excited, no, I am no position of tying the knot soon :P Like any Al-Kauthar courses, it was just hard to miss. We always know that nikah is not wajib, rather it is recommended, if you already have the various means to shoulder the responsibility. The common feedback or statement made by those 'aunties' or whoever that has everything to say in my life pertaining my condition of being single at this age is, 'Kalau tak kahwin Nabi tak mengaku umat tau...'

I agree that we have to try our best to live up the the sunnah, but looks who's talking, if they really stick to the sunnah, they will not be making the statement in the first place. There are various reasons as why people my age remain single, you can only guess. I won't dwell into details on the rulings of marriage, as to when it is wajib, recommended, makhruh and haram, and I won't put myself in any position, except that I am not in the wajib category yet, insyaAllah. Honestly, I don't think I fall into that category, I am not about to commit zina just because I am not married yet, and I also in no mood to steal anybody's husband just to get married. Plus, I will not just take on any Ahmad, Sulaiman or Iqbal (muslim's version of Tom, Dick and Harry :P) so just that I can silenced the question of marriage. People say beggars can't be choosers, but I am not a beggar. I have qualities, (questionable and debatable, but I still do) and I was hoping to find someone that at least of the same level to spend the rest of my life with, (the higher, the better). But even then, if the guy is no more educated than I am, what matters most is his deen. If that is not right in the first place, than as the Sheikh said, assalamualaikum warahmatullahiwabarakatuh... (with hands waving off...)

Its not like I have never tried to find, I did, but nothing positive turns out yet. Last Twins of Faith conference, they had this Marriage Facilitation session. They took the speed dating concept and tried to matchmake any interested brothers and sisters in a halal environment. I signed up, not knowing what to expect. The initial response shows that the split was around 20 : 80 (brothers : sisters). Okaaayyyy.....that is so appropriate :P The organizers tried their very best to bring in more brothers, but how can they? the conference participants are made of at least 70% women. The remaining male are either married or small kids.

Anyhoo...they managed to close the gap by getting the volunteers to participate as well. When we finally had the session, these are my observations:
1. Almost 70% of the sisters are from the age 27-35, working professionals ranging from Master student, high school teachers, doctors, curators and engineers (yours truly)
2. Almost 50-60% of the brothers are foreign students (age 22 and below)

Now, tell me, how do you match make these majority group? Which leads me to few more questions.
1. Where are all the 27-35 years old man? They are either married or they have made their choice. Those that is still single and in 30's don't go around attending Islamic conference, else we would have them in the session.
2. Where are all the sisters below 25? They are either in college, busy studying or just started of their career.

*I wouldnt want to pick a brother that is 22 years old, no doubt he has good intention of staying away from the haram by getting married early, and the fact that he joins the conference tells me that he got his priorities right, but, I need somebody that is ready financially, (or the very least emotionally). I need him to be my rock, I wouldn't want to take on the burden of playing big sis in a marriage.

So session no. 1 was not a success to me definitely. Without losing hope, the following week, they have another Al-Kauthar course, Home Sweet Home, and they had another session of marriage facilitation. Same thing happened. Majority of the brothers still belongs to the same age range. Again, no success there. Sheikh keeps on emphasizing that if we are looking for a mango, go to a mango market, you will not find it in the lemon market. The session is claimed to have the mango that we are looking for, but for me, all the mango are way too young, the ripe mango are off the market :P

I saw first hand how the market in Malaysia looks like, maybe I have not been to enough Islamic event to see the actual number of good practising Muslim male out there, but from my limited observation, we seriously in deficit for good quality Muslim men. It turns out that this is actually a global issue. The number of unmarried Muslim female all around the world is increasing. This sister in the US was looking for solution, but turns out she is being mocked by some of the 'highly educated' readers. What I experienced in the conference has been shared by another sister in UK. So tell me now, don't we have a greater ummah issue here? Latest poll in Malaysia still show that higher number of unmarried male than female, but do we go into details to see how many of these men are good practising Muslim men?

A phone call from an old friend yesterday almost break my heart, but not quite. She was saying that there is talk among them to match make me to a certain somebody, but they were quite certain I will reject the person because to them I have 'high taste'. How can I not? At work, I've met many good Muslim men, more than I have ever met anywhere else in my life. Seeing that these species existed, wouldn't I set a high standard as well? Before you get any ideas, they are all married :) What I'm saying is this, I am not looking for just man (any Malay man for that matter), he has to make the first cut, a good Muslim, and it breaks my heart that some of my friends could not see that.

From last week's course, the Sheikh keeps on mentioning few scholars that remains single throughout their entire life, namely Imam An-Nawawi, Ibn Taymiyah and Imam al-Tabari. Are these scholars not a good Muslim? Then why do they remain single until end of life? People can argue maybe they have female slaves, but they off all people knew the greatness of marriage, how it double-triple your rewards for any good deeds, then why are they not following sunnah? The answer is simple. They may have their own reasons for being single, but look at what they have left for the ummah, their studies has helped many people living by the right way of Islam. Their publications has reached generations and generations of muslim, and nobody can deny that insyaAllah, Rasulullah SAW is proud to have them in his ummah.

This morning, I was approached by Dr K. He's the lead for all the da'wah work in the office. They started this young parent club and they had their first meeting, I was invited but could not joined then. The objective of this group is just to socialize and share as much wrt Islamic way of life and one of the major focus is parenting. Dr K actually asked me to organize one of the event. My first reaction to him "I am not a young parent." He was caught off guard, maybe he never thought that I would counter with that statement. No offence, I was just joking and alhamdulillah he got it. Anyhow, like it or not, I am in the club, kids or no kid, spouse or no spouse :P

So for now, I will continue what I am doing, I am working to become a better Muslim. I pray to Allah that I get a mate that is better than I am, the one that can guide me to Jannah. If so Allah send him anytime soon, and I am destined to get married, alhamdulillah. If Allah choose to delay granting my prayers, even better, because I have the full confidence Allah will keep His promise somehow, and the best is to be given in Jannah. So what I do now, is work towards Jannah, and the rest will fall into places, insyaAllah. I am happy with my condition now. I enjoy my freedom, and as long as I am not doing anything that can invite fitna, or against the shariah, I will let Allah be my sole judge. The remaining mortal jury can say all they want, but I know Allah is always with me ;)

*and I don't need lecture on accepting polygamy, that may just invite another post :P 

From here