Friday, January 23, 2015

Mat Saleh are very......

Asslamualaikum warahmatullahi wa barakatuh...

I have always been a self motivated person (self motivated does not means I have high motivation). It just means that I do things on my own, with little or no motivation from other people. My family, a typical Malay family, as long as I scored in exam, that is good. And at times in uni when I failed some papers, I did not told my mum, for fear that she gets over worried. But if I say all is good, its all that matters.

So almost every major step of my life, I made my own decision, maybe once or twice I have been influenced by other people to take a different path. One was at a point of choosing a course for my degree, a friend talked me into taking Chemical Engineering and look what (or where) it gets me today.

I am not blaming my family for the lack of motivation, we are not that highly educated. Only my generation (the younger ones) made it to university, my older cousins, some barely finish high school. My mother didn't even go to high school. So yeah, you don't know what you don't know. When I started working, I was lucky to have a boss that is not a typical Malay. He most of the time is more mat saleh than mat saleh themselves, in terms of how he thinks. He pushed me to achieve certain things, and I was (and am still) glad for it.

Here, I have almost constant encounter with Mat Saleh, most of them during the fun run. If I ditched that activity, I would be just another Asian yang memang katak bawah tempurung. From my once a week conversation with them, I found that they are very encouraging. I do feel that. And since I have been quite self motivated since young, if feels a bit different, I maybe at times took it the wrong way, I may think that they are being nice to me, where as in fact its just how they are, which is nice anyway. Am I making sense? Maybe I'm not..hahaha..

Okla, simply out, I like talking to some of them, the kind of talk that I did not have back home, the encouragement, that little push for me to do extra, to be a little bit different. I hope I can emulate that behaviour and reciprocate that to my nieces and nephews. I hope they can talk to me about anything, that they would not be afraid to share their failures with me so that we can work in finding the solution together. I really hope so, insyaAllah.

Till next time, wassalam.

p/s: I still do not have the courage to share my failures with anybody yet. Maybe its ego, maybe its fear to be looked down upon, maybe its some other things. I don't know. Life is complicated ain't it?  

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“Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you." ~ William Arthur Ward...

So what say you? ;)