Money Matters, Does it? or It Does Not?

A friend texted me, she was asking my opinion if she is about to be introduced to a guy that earn less that she did. The introduction is meant to end in marriage, if both parties agreed, not just meeting some random acquaintances. Here's what I think, (mix a bit of both English and Malay..sorry.. :) )

Dalam hadis ada menyebut tentang cara memilih jodoh, perempuan macam mana....maybe kita boleh ambik sedikit sebanyak...

"Wanita dinikahi kerana empat faktor, yakni kerana harta kekayaannya, kerana kedudukannya,kerana kecantikannya dan kerana agamanya. Hendaknya pilihlah yang beragama agar berkat kedua tanganmu. " (HR. Muslim)
 

1. Harta kekayaan, yang ni subjektif, not necessarily duit yang banyak, boleh juga jadi budi bahasa, sopan santun dan budi pekerti. Memang duit tu penting, tapi kalau kaya tapi miskin budi bahasa, kita nak jatuh cinta pon susah kan, belum bab nak blend in ngan family kita lagi..
 
2. Kedudukan...hmm..kedudukan di mata siapa? mata manusia, atau mata Allah...? pada aku pada mata Allah yang patut kita target. Yang ni kita kena nilai sendiri, there is no shortcut way to it. Aku cadangkan, kenal dulu...tgk mcm mana gaya dia, pada aku, orang yang ada kedudukan di mata Allah, hidupnya dirahmati, dalam kata lain, x bnyk masalah yang pelik2 dan complicated...and miskin is not one of them. Miskin is just a condition they are born with. If he managed to demonstrate that he has work his best nak kurangkan jurang kemiskinan, good for him, orang macam ni ada potensi. Nampak dia ada usaha nak tingkatkan kualiti hidup. Orang yang tak dirahmati Allah sentiasa dalam masalah, not the kind that yang Allah nak uji, tapi masalah yang terang2 cari sendiri. Now you don't want to drag yourself in his neverending problem. Aku tau memang susah nak tau orang tu ada masalah ke tak kalo takat jumpa 2-3 kali, tapi bab2 ni ko boleh risik2 rasanya..

3. Kecantikan, again, this is subjektif, cantik kat mata ko, x semestinya cantik kat mata aku, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so ni mmg taste masing2. Just that ingatlah, jodoh kita insyaAllah akan kekal seumur hidup, so kalo muka cam pecah rumah, sudi ke nak mengadap hari2 sampai tua? hehehe...asal sedap mata ko memandang, ok la tu.. hensem2 sgt kang ko pulak rasa tergugat...takut ramai pompuan yang kejar dia because of his looks :P

4 Agama, last but not least...yang ni penting. I don't think I have to elaborate. Ko nak cari calon suami, yang bakal jadi imam ko, imam anak2 ko. Kalo dia sendiri tak betul, and tak nampak gaya nak betulkan hidup dia, then, its not worth your investment. Imam maksud aku kat sini is pemimpin, yang bukan takat tau cakap, tapi x pandai nak buat, yang bole lead solat jemaah ko satu family....Tgk solat, tu sgt penting, kalo solat pon hujung2 waktu, camna dia nak bimbing orang lain...

Logically speaking, hidup perlu duit, tapi duit bnyk mana pon x cukup. Memang susah nak cari lelaki zaman sekarang yang boleh compete ngan income kita. Ada, but almost all are taken. Tgk berapa jauh jarak pendapatan dia ngan ko, kalo RM2K vs 5K...macam agak jauh. Kalaula korang kahwin, can you maintain your current lifestyle? That is the compromise you have to make. And with his income, can he provide you a good life, if not comfortable?

One more thing, with lower income, what about the level of education, SPM? Diploma? Degree?  Ni pon penting jugak, just so you can see eye to eye with him. You are going to live forever for quite sometime, so I would imagine, at least kalo xde pelajaran tinggi pon, asalkan tak kolot dan mahu terima pendapat orang, insyaAllah ok.. Aku paling pantang orang yang rasa diri dia betul je, no matter what.

Well...panjang pulak aku bersyarah... ni semua pendapat aku je, yang mana ko boleh terima pakai, amikla, yang mana rasa x sesuai tu, anggaplah beza pendapat ye ;)

Yang penting ko kena nilai baik buruknya, pendapatan kurang bukan faktor besar, banyak lagi benda2 lain yang kita patut tgk. So aku sarankan, kenal dulu orangnya, unless kalo ko rasa gaji dia rendah sgt, and ko taknak bagi harapan palsu, then don't. Kalo agak2 ok, cuba kenal dulu...Allah Maha Mengetahui....    

I hope I said the right thing. At least that is how I see the issue, there is no clear right or wrong in scouting a potential husband with less income than what we currently make, but lets not be blinded, life is not always about money, but money is a big part of life. This is not just for her, for me as well. Though I may not be in her position yet, but its a reminder for me, my sort of check and balance.

C04-A picture of somewhere you've been to

Inside Masjid Nabawi

It was June 2009. A plan of 4 eventually turns to a solo trip. I have learnt a lot, and upon reflecting after I returns, much more for me to do. I am hoping to get there again, this time with my parents, insyaAllah. There is nothing beats the feeling of being sourrounded by people hoping to be closer to the creator. 

C03-A habit that you wish you didn't have

I have two actually, that I wish I can kick it away.

The first one would be, procrastination. I mean seriously. For certain things I can make a proper plan, followed by execution and really sticking to the timeline. But for some, no matter how good I planned, I tend to almost always procrastinate. I wanted to do so many things at one time and at the same time I did none. I am punctual when meeting people though, but to get things done, it would take huge effort from me, just to stay on track.

I know it is lame, but it is really my Achilles heel. If I kick out this habit, I can be more efficient, then I can get more items done. I know it’s good to have a break, wind down once in a while, but for me the once is too many.  

I am not only talking about procrastinating at work, at home as well. I have this few stuffs that should have some kind of rack to put on it. Have been planning to buy a proper piece of furniture to place them, but till today, those things are still laying on the floor….Haish…….

learn spanish is one of those things...

The second is this 'tak apa' attitude. If I miss something, (say work opportunity or some other life's opportunity) I would not be very upset, instead I always believe that if its meant to be mine, it will be. On one part, that kind of attitude help me not to focus too much of the issue, and be more laid back compared to some other people that I knew. However, I can be seen as someone that is lacking of effort, if all the things are treated that way. I wish I can learn how to balance between letting go and holding on and being persistent.

Its alright... the ice is only melting...

Told Ya!!

I have a confession, people always talk about closeted gay or lesbian, and don't worry, I'm not one of them. :P I am a closeted football fan. Many people did not know, except for few chosen ones. This is because I never watched football outside the comfort of my home. And I never really lepak with guys and talk football with them. I don't parade in my MU's jersey the day after they clinched the 19th BPL title. I keep it all to myself.

Once I wore the jersey to work, and my colleague noticed that, and he immediately assumed that I am an MU fan. Let me clear the air, I don't support clubs, I support nations, Portugal and Spain to be exact ;) If at all any matches between the clubs, my hierarchy of supporting would be like this:

1. No Chelsea..die die no Chelsea... :)
2. If MU vs Liverpool, I would enjoy the game, but maybe I will root for MU (that is when C.Ronaldo was still there, but now.. I dunno..hehehe...)
3. If any BPL club vs. La Liga club, hands down, La Liga (¿en qué estabas pensando?)
4. If Barça vs Real Madrid... I would still enjoy the game very much, but my heart goes to Real, because they have my Ricardo Carvalho and C.Ronaldo ;)

So get the picture?

Last nite was the UEFA Champions League final at Wembley, its MU vs Barça. My colleague who saw me wearing the blue Man U jersey, forwarded a viewing party invitation for the live telecast. He and some other guys are watching. At first I have some reservation to join, because almost all of them are MU's hardcore fan. But what the heck, I'll just go and enjoy the game ;) and I was really hoping Barça to kick some MU's asses by the end of the game. Out of the 20 odds people there, only less than 5 was rooting for Barça, and when Pedro scored on the 27th minute, I only heard my voice screaming...hahahaha....

The few MU's fan in front of me were smoking profusely, and when it looks like there is no chance that MU can recover, more smokes came in my way. This validated my previous decisions to watch football at home. No smoke, just peace and quite, and I was able to view in any position I deemed suitable :r in my nightwear!!

So by now the whole world again being served the fact that Spanish football is yet the greatest in Europe. It was amazing to see Messi at work getting passed by 5 of MU's defence, all at one go. Superb!! and Villa's curved ball left everybody speechless, seriously ;) 

los chicos felices :)

So why did I bought that blue Man U jersey in the first place? Because its blue, and I don't like Chelsea, and also because C. Ronaldo looks so good wearing the long sleeve one, yes, I am vain :D

C02-The meaning behind your blog name

My blog name is "Over the Rainbow, Beneath the Dark Cloud". I know its rather long, but somehow I love it anyway. It all started with Somewhere Over the Rainbow, as I love the song too much (I guess you knew that already by now).

I have always been infatuated by rainbows, I stopped just by the sights of it. Even when I was in school, we learnt about prism and ray of lights, and how it breaks into 7 different colours. The simple expriment intrigues me. I saw this one movie, the scene shows a table lamp, made full of glass crystal with various prism shape. It was placed by the window, and everytime the sunrise, the walls will be filled with rainbow. I surely would like to have that kind of lamp one day... I wish..

I believe in life, it is not always bright and shiny, there bound to be dark clouds, but somehow beneath the dark cloud which most of the time followed by crazy thunderstorm and without fail the monsoon...rest assured there will be rainbow coming up next. We've experienced the bad, if not worse, but we'll get rewarded at the mesmerizing sight of a rainbow....And that is how we should look at life's trial and tribulation.

"Kadang-kadang ALLAH sembunyikan matahari, DIA datangkan hujan petir. Kita bersedih dan tertanya-tanya kemana hilangnya matahari , rupa-rupanya, ALLAH nak hadiahkan kita pelangi yang indah. ALLAH berikan kita kesusahan sebab DIA nak berikan kesenangan sekiranya kita tabah dan terus berusaha."

C01-A recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

Hi there!! The first of the series. I am in the middle of plant shutdown, hence the recent picture is a bit messy ;)

15 interesting facts of myself..hmm..this is difficult :P

1. My parents both are from Kedah, but they met each other in KL. I was born in Pahang, but raised in KL. At home we speak hardcore Kedah dialect, despite growing up in KL.
2. I am the second in 6 siblings, all girls :)
3. All of my siblings (except the last 2) did not went to kindergarten, but I managed to read at the age of 5+ (thanks to my mom, the home tutor)
4. I spent humongous amount of time in front of TV, since young. There is nothing much my mom can do to get me away from the box, till now...
5. I learn proper English from watching too much TV, I always liked watching TV, but one day my Std 4 English teacher told us to watch more English show to improve our command in the language, and I proudly use that each time my mom banned me from watching TV..hehehe... :D
6. Goes crazy when it comes to lavender & lemon smell
7. I can imitate a drawing quite well, but not drawing from scratch (I have low level of imagination).
8. I am scared of high places, not because I was afraid of falling, but more scared that I would jump!!
9. My first cake that I bake was carrot cake, it turns out really bad, and it wasn't edible at all. I have to throw the whole thing. It took me more than a few years to finally attempted to bake another one.
10. Once in Standard 4 or 5, I joined in dancing competition, and we (my partner and I) got second place!! I was dancing tango to a song called Delaila (I think!!)
11. My high school friends that I hang out with till now is the one that are the same class with me in Form 1only. In form 2 I switched classes but still hangs out with them, and we continued till today ;)
12. Once in a while I have this need to cook or bake to feed people, and off late, I have been making few rounds of brownies and it was a hit...I loike!!
13. I have a niece who shared the same birthday as I am!!
14. Am not fond of other peoples kid, meaning even if they are my best friends' child, I won't took liking in them immediately. I'll see how they behave, and then I'll consider whether to like them or not, but I was never going ga-ga for any babies (who say the kids will like me too? perasan!!)
15. Am not an animal lover. I see cat, no doubt they are cute and all, but I will not entertain them for any means.

Since most of the tags that I have done asked basically the same thing, I kinda struggled for this one, I think there is not much interesting facts after all :)

Me and the Challenge

I don't know what's gotten over me, but I think I will do it ;) Been seeing many blogger does that and the topic varies. Upon my blogstalking, I found this one is the most interesting and I may be able to complete it. Now with the shutdown load has subsided, I should be...

After few months deliberating, I have decided to take on this challenge . I will be starting tomorrow. No guarantee I will be able to finish this in 30 consecutive days though..hehehe...Though maybe some topics to be changed to MY liking, I'll try not to be very narcissistic :P

This is a journey for me to know myself better, and although a friend had once said to me, "You are too in love with yourself", I think there is no harm in that :) I have to love myself, or else who would? rite? So friends, brace yourself, as you will be taken on a ride to Jeetland pretty soon!!

All aboard!!! :D